Monthly Archives: April 2015

Renewing All of You after an Unhealthy Relationship


Reviving your spirit, letting go of things you’ve held on to that have caused you pain and harm has been an ongoing task after escaping an unhealthy relationship. Emptying the negativity of the past is not an easypure_joy[1] activity.I want to encourage you to continue with all the good you’re doing for in the end the new you that emerges will be strong, powerful, positive, and determined. But in all this transformation don’t forget about the outside.

It’s easy to overlook because you may think “well there’s nothing wrong with the way I look”. Are you sure? Let me ask a few questions and then you decide.

  1. When you give yourself that one last look in the mirror before you walk out the door are you smiling?
  2. Do you look with excitement and anticipation to the day ahead?
  3. Do the clothes you wear reflect the new you you’ve been working on?
  4. Do you look up and not down when you’re going about your business?
  5. Do you greet people with a smile and/or a nod of hello?
  6. Does the physical you reflect a person focused on being healthy as well?

I ask these questions because if there’s been a transformation on the inside it should reach the outside as well. The new you should exhibit an air of confidence and assurance that you know exactly who you are. At first it may seem strange and out of character but why should it? Haven’t you worked hard to let go of things that have weighed you down?  Haven’t you quieted that voice that told you deserved to be treated as a non-person? Didn’t you say good-bye to the butterflies that used to rule you when you heard a raised voice or coward in fear from physical harm? Yes. These are all great accomplishments and should be celebrated. Let’s take it a step further and make the outside you reflect the positive changes happening on the inside. Let your new walk reflect your new air of lightness. There should be a sense of purpose in every step and a determination that lights up your face.

That unhealthy relationship stole your joy and you’ve worked hard to it back. You’ve surrounded yourself with new friends and let go of some you discovered really weren’t your friends. You speak affirming messages of strength, love and forgiveness every day.  You write them on your heart so that they have become a second skin. Wear it proudly. Your glow is coming forth so give that glow a new home. Improve your outer appearance as well. Make these five tips a part of your new routine.

  1. Get some exercise – walk, bike or join a gym if you can afford it, either way don’t let money or the lack of money keep you from improving your physical health.
  2. Eat more fruits and vegetables and drink lots of water while cutting down on sugar and empty calories.
  3. Get a new wardrobe one that reflects the new you and again don’t let money or lack thereof prevent you from making a change. Use your creativity. You’ll be surprised what you can do.
  4. Let the joy on the inside be reflected in the face you present to the world. Smile more and often, and greet people with a genuine look. Don’t be surprised if you get them back in return.
  5. Make a promise to yourself to always love you.

Let today be the starting point for ‘Renewing All of You after an Unhealthy Relationship’. Most of all I encourage you to enjoy it with the new you you’re creating from the inside out.